Wednesday, June 17th, 2020
It is cold outside, at least cold enough to swap the summer dress for jeans and sweater for the day. But outlook for weekend is bright – sunny, 34C, so we may adventure to yet another water hole for a swim. As the day progresses it gets more and more cloudy before a light drizzle starts, which in the early evening turns to pouring rain; we do manage to sneak a short walk in between the drizzle and the downpour and see four of the “Black Lives Matter” signs we procured for the Hood.
The weather matches my mood as I am still upset with myself, no one else to blame. I should just not have responded, ignored the text messages or only send my COVID-19 timeline. Then again, I have been here before, more than once. I have walked away countless times. Every time I was sure this is it, we shall never speak or meet again, though this time I fear I was destructive enough for this to really have been the last interaction. So, saddened at a loss of a relationship which was not ever really there with someone definitely not mine. While every interaction was beautiful, they were far and few between. I guess the actual loss is more that of an idea. The idea of wanting to share or discuss something with someone, just to realize they have irretrievably disappeared from one’s life. A bit like after my dad passed when I would catch myself thinking: “I need to discuss this with dad, I wonder what he would make off it”. Factually though, it makes no difference as the desired conversations were never had to begin with, which begs the question: is it really a loss? It sure feels like one and I am in self-inflicted mourning as the world seems to be slowly drowning around me. Maybe I would not feel quite so bad, had what I wrote not been so hurtful.
As of yesterday, school is over, and EM has completed her junior year and I guess can now be considered a senior. Eleven years ago, I set up a day care for her to begin her educational journey, it sure does not feel like eleven years ago.
Just in time for the school year to end her laptop packed up – just died. She took it in to be fixed, turns out there is water in the machine. No one knows how that could have happened. The worst is, that all the data is gone and there is no back up. They did take the hard drive out and tried to salvage the data, but no luck. This resulted in an emotional melt down as every picture she has ever taken is now gone unless we find some other way to recover the data. So, she is also not having a great day. At least she can now put her COVID cheque to good use. Currently she is partial towards a MacPro rather than the MacAir.
My work machine has also been giving me trouble and apparently requires to be reimaged. With offices closed that is likely to be a while coming and I will just have to deal with the constant freezing of the file explorer, which is annoying and such a waste of time. So all in all a day like the weather – grey and even the cat is moping around.
The only item alive and kicking seems to be the virus. New hotspots in Germany, selected new infections in New Zealand, rising cases in the USA (+23k today) to bring the global tally to 8.3 Million and death tolls in the USA scarily close to 120k. There seems to be a correlation between rising cases and reopening states, which does not really come as a surprise; with people becoming less vigilant the virus has an easier time spreading.
Meanwhile Pence and Fauci are contradicting each other. While Fauci warns the first wave is not over, never mind a second wave, Pence dismisses a second wave altogether claiming the administration is winning the fight against the virus in the first wave. If anything, that is delusional as the numbers attest. It is also doubtful if the Swedish model is really working, seeing Sweden is seeing the second highest mortality rate after the UK and no herd immunity is in sight.
Increasingly there seem to be questions around reliability of tests as some appear to test negative, despite having all the symptoms.
For those looking to get back to some form of social interaction there is some good news coming out of the most recent research on how the virus spreads, which suggests it requires close encounters over sustain periods of time in enclosed spaces. There is also progress on the treatment front. Research indicates that know anti inflammatory drugs may help in the treatment of COVID-19 patients, helping them avoid the cytocine storm. This corroborates my theory that I may well have had the virus in January and the only reason it did not cause havoc was because I had been on anti-inflammatory meds for weeks before. While not a perfect cure it is one more piece to the treatment of the virus, making it less deadly.
Certainly in the US after the virus come the bills, sometimes in the millions of USD. No more evidence needed that the US health care system is very broken. My hospital bed in Germany (not ICU) was EUR 42/day compare to the one cited here at a mere USD 9.700/day; that is insane! Not even a suite in a five star hotel costs that much and from my experience US hospitals are anything but five star.
The political news continues to be incomprehensible to me. How can a country pride itself to be a democracy when it tolerates voter suppression? Surely there must be a way to support more polling stations, registration etc. in poorer communities - even if just to spite the Republicans.Maybe the world should send election officials to guarantee fair and free elections in the USA. It has proven very effective in so called “Third World” countries. There seems to be so much that needs fixing.
The New York Times today reports that violence used by police against BLM protest has been unprecedented in this century. Ordinary people in more than 99 cities have been teargassed. At least there is some justice for Raychard Brooks who was shot in the back while fleeing the police. But there is more disconcerting news on the racism front. Police are investigating the hanging of two black men as hate crimes. And to top it off, an ally of agent orange is appointed as head of Voice of America with the objective of turning the public, international broadcasting service into a Trump mouth piece, so much for free press in the greatest democracy in the world
What is happening to this once great country?